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Looking Back

As we will likely not post much or very frequently here in the coming months and years, I wanted to link up some posts from the last 13 years of this family record for quick access. Click “previous” and “next” to explore other posts about everyday beauty and some precious memories from our years living in the Middle East…Thank you for journeying with us!

Here are some favorites:

Cultural curiosities and lessons: Iftar , weddings, local dress , visits, salons, the olive harvest, more weddings, soap making, the souq, pregnancy, and welcoming babies

Recipes and How-To’s: ma’mouls, limona’na , makloubeh, khoubeza, soap, mjeddera, waraq diwali, lebneh, sahlab, mana’ish, and malfouf

Treasures from Another Year

This year felt like many things: gaining traction in learning, finding there is still so very much to learn, deepening relationships, opening our hands to new vision, absorbing disappointment and loosening our grip on our own plans, and noting a number of gifts unique to this season. Being very close to family feels like something to treasure particularly in this season. Natural beauty and ways to enjoy it as a family with others – we are ever grateful…

Summer

Summer came and went so fast. It was our first full Summer here among the redwoods and we dove in head first to the beauty and unique natural world here. The boys learned how to complete long swims in the open ocean and play gaga ball at camp. Elanor jumped into creek and pool water and kept our days full of fun. They all loved being with family in Montana and being near Omi and Opa and other family here. We kept another scruffy garden and are still happily eating from it.

The time may have come for me to finish sharing on this blog as formats have changed and my own focus has shifted to helping our family adjust fully. I am so grateful for this space over the years, where I could pick out vivid moments and creativity moments and focus on them, sharing them here.

Evan is 9!

This one, our creative and kind one, is now a nine year old. We got to share treats with neighbors and friends and his soccer team in honor of the occasion. His cousins came that week and creek adventures and favorite foods shared with them made for an extra special week of celebration. We love you, Mr Maker!

Flora and Fauna

While it is not where expected to land for this season, there are many time when we look up and feel amazed at all that is around us. How did we get to be here? We have been gently welcomed by friends who can show us more about the natural world here and we are grateful. There are towering redwoods that have withstood so much through the years and wild sea life. In Jordan, it felt important to know the different types of trees around us and understand the animals and plants of the desert where we lived. It became beautiful to us. Now, we are becoming acquainted with the flora and fauna of this vivid coastline. We are still a long way off but new experiences, weekly polar bear club, hikes and the library are helping. I am beginning to know whether I am looking at a gray whale or a bed of kelp, a porpoise fin or a diving pelican in the distance…some of the time at least.

On The Incline

We keep noting that this particular season in our reentry feels vaguely familiar…like the first year of college or our first year overseas learning Arabic. The learning curve is steep and we don’t always feel sure we have much to offer yet in our new setting. But it’s also a time energized for absorbing and learning and it’s filled with little goals. I once read that exercise is more beneficial if it keeps switching up – starting on a different foot each time, changing directions, etc. Somehow, the work your mind and body do to quickly adjust builds more muscle and stamina…I like to imagine that’s true for all the little and big learning we are doing in this time. Or maybe it’s all just awkward and worth a laugh…either way, we are not bored.

Shepherds and Advent

I was joking recently with a friend that, if I had known how attached our children would be to the Advent calendar I made ten years ago, I would have taken the time to make it straight or at least less scruffy. It was the winter we failed to heat our apartment and our breath came out in puffs as we chased a toddler Caleb. Now, the calendar links us to our family culture and our traditions in December. It’s made of felt scraps and leftover fabric a friend sent as we settled into that chilly first apartment in Jordan. Each day has a verse and an activity…hot chocolate, singing a hymn by candlelight, a pillow fight. Our boys anticipate this much more than Christmas day.

The calendar hangs by a staff that is special to us, a hand-shaped crook gifted to Jeremy by an elderly patient who was also a shepherd. We love Jordanian shepherds who are weather-worn, brave, and rough around the edges. They smell like wood smoke and wool and the female shepherds used to take my face in their rough hands as they blessed me. Their eyes sparkled and I love imagining the angels making their secret appearance to these friends on a quiet night. They were the perfect audience for that outdoor concert. And so our simple Advent calendar and its staff are deeply imbedded in our December evenings.

A Hobbit Hole and The Simplest Things

I was reminded recently not to despise small beginnings. I guess to take that a step further, we are learning to let ourselves be surprised by the smallest of things right now. A season of unemployment also means a season of time together. We call our little space our hobbit hole because it is cozy and half beneath the ground on a hillside. We’ve thrifted and dumpster dived and pulled out the sewing machine to fill it with little things that make it home and we are surprised that being right next to one another, hearing each other breathe, is just what we needed. We’ve barely started projects we’d hoped to complete by this time but something tells me the pulling in together of this season will be what really matters in hindsight. Smallest things.

Eleven

Caleb turned eleven and wanted to backpack again and pack in an apple pie. He also enjoyed time with his Omi and Opa, neighbors and friends over games and the Middle Eastern foods he loves so much. His cousins made him a scavenger hunt that included morse code…This guy is brave, an amazing brother, honest, a history and geography maven and has the most vibrant funny bone around. We love watching you be you and have since we met you Caleb!

Climate Whiplash and Time with Family

This “messy middle” time has meant some fatigue and a sense that we are slogging at times, one minute feeling at home and the next feeling a vague travel weariness.  While a job and projects are in the works, this season also means freedom to see family, to enjoy our surroundings as much as we can as a family, and the chance to debrief our years overseas at an awesome program.  Along the way, we’ve seen such beautiful scenes, pulling out snow gear and jumping into the ocean both in the same month.  We’ve been learning about paradox, the gift of holding extremes in our experience (beautiful moments alongside gritty hard seasons in our memories) together in tension and learning to practice gratefulness for all of it.  This time can come with fluctuation of all kinds.  It is meaningful to note that there is a lot of beauty along the way.

 

One

This little light just turned one.  Strawberry cupcakes, family and neighbors, her mama’s baby dress…  Just watching you become you is a joy, little one.

Recipe for the Messy Middle

In preparing to transition away from people and a land we love, we read up a bit on what to expect.  We knew there would be challenges while we waited for direction, where to serve next.  We were aware of potential discomfort but also chances for creativity.  We’ve landed for this little season in a special location…here is our current family recipe for this “messy middle” time:

Recipe:

2 liters/quarts of homemade yogurt and lebneh (keeps us grounded to make by hand something we ate so much of in Jordan)

1 weekly family run and swim in the cold ocean. We call it Polar Bear Club.

a handful of visits to new neighbors.  garnish with listening ears.  option to add a plate of cookies

2-3 walks or hikes on most days…in the morning and after dinner will yield best results and keep newly mobile baby happy

1 copy of Andrew Murray’s “Waiting on God,” read aloud when possible along with Alex books (childhood favorites)

2 large soft sherpa blankets for reading aloud

4 days of memory making with loved ones we’ve missed here in America

3-4 weekly phone calls or messages with those we miss so much in Jordan

large pinch of gratefulness for people to love, both here and there

1 large flask of hot cocoa to take on cool morning adventures

12 marshmallows to put in that hot cocoa

2 tablespoons of laughter when disappointments and rejections or awkwardness come, remembering that these are just signposts on a loving path

8 Arabic phrases a day in the home to help us feel like we have a secret family code language

4 cups of patience, more as needed…probably a lot more

*Mix together and bake for however long the season calls for.

Simple Family Culture in Transition

Returning to our passport country after so many years is a lot like entering a new culture in some ways, especially as we walk through these months with our children who have never lived in the US.  Mostly, we have enjoyed the time together and with loved ones and given ourselves grace when we are slow to figure some things out.  (I’m looking at you, parking and self checkout)… And we’ve focused on making some of our own little traditions too, taking hold of some simple things that bind us together and bring a lot of joy in this new season, kind of like a quirky little family scaffolding.

 

A Hundred Thank You’s

The last few months, we have been saying so many goodbyes – at least for now – to a land we have called home for 11 years.  We moved here in 2010, pregnant with our first child and sort of bewildered.  All these years later, we have three miracles – two of them born here and the third conceived in pure surprise miracle fashion, lots of desert wrinkles, worn out clothes and underwear, and hearts full of gratitude.  We’ve had the privilege of watching local and international colleagues move into leadership roles, allowing us to step aside so they can grow and we can spend some time in our passport country near family.  We’ve spent these months working and packing…but mostly hugging so many people who have become dear to us, like family, and sitting long with dusty desert sunsets and ancient ruins flanked by villages.  Our boys have grown used to calling their goodbyes and thank you’s to the many places and scenes and foods that have become our home and our teachers and our lives here.  It’s hard to put into words and so, consistent with this mostly-photo journal space, I will put most of our thank-you’s in pictures…

 

Souq

Recently, in our favorite vegetable market, my son eavesdropped on a nearby conversation in Arabic while filling a bag with flat, sweet peaches.  He learned from the conversation that the price I’d been quoted for strawberries wasn’t the best one and let me know what was.  And it struck me that he’d become a true souq son – a crucial participant in the local shopping life.  The souq is a Middle Eastern downtown shopping area.  It is a lively place filled with shouting, frying felafel, ripening fruit, and wares spilling out onto the streets.  Its dusty chaos gets into your bones.  Some of our favorite places include the large secondhand outdoor and indoor marketplace, the ‘ataar (where I get things to make soap and balm with friends), the bakery (which smells like heavenly phyllo dough, warm cheese and sugar syrup), and the large craft shop with tiny notions stuck into all of its corners.  There’s really nothing like it and it’s become a part of us these years…

Mr Maker Turns 8

Evan loves making things and has since he was small so we’ve called him Mr. Maker for years.  He has an eye for design and a healthy focus, whether erecting a lego masterpiece or taking apart our friend’s laptop.  He just turned eight and we had an engineering party, at his request, complete with an engineering timed challenge, lemon cake and water games.  We love Evan’s confidence and creativity, his loyalty and affection, his articulate love for learning.  Happy birthday, Mr Maker!

Exploring the South

We recently returned to some of our favorite spots in the South of our country, expressing our gratefulness for our times there over the past decade.  We snorkeled in the sea and hiked desert peaks.  We rode donkeys and ran our hands along old stones, beholding an ancient monastery.  Elanor rode along for much of it, adding her own baby commentary to the experience.  The desert has become so special to us.

Mana’ish

When I was a few days from giving birth, I felt a need to make manaquish.  It was an odd nesting sensation diagnostic of our unique life, of the comfort foods we might need in those foggy postpartum weeks.  Good thing I’d stashed our own local zaatar into my luggage.  Zaatar is a comfort food in the Middle East, a shared daily dip.  My children love it as much for the taste as for the dipping ritual.  I believe it started as a result of hillside foraging.  Women might take a walk together and gather wild thyme (“zaatar” in Arabic – it’s pronounced ZAH-tar).  They might bring it home to dry it, mix it with sumac, roasted sesame seeds and a proprietary blend of lemon and salt unique to that household.  While it is delicious as a daily dip, adhering to bread slick with olive oil, manaquish (pronounced mana’ish most often) elevates zaatar.  It is the ultimate street food, purchased from small store fronts where dough is thrown and stretched, spread with olive oil, sprinkled with zaatar and baked in a very hot oven.  It comes out a bit charred, the crusts tan with heat and oil.  It is crispy and tangy and, in our house it turns out, the ultimate comfort food.

RV

How to get to Montana to see loved ones especially vulnerable to covid?  Hmmm, we would need to get creative and we would need a miracle.  And that is how we ended up on a snowy journey in an RV, road schooling and keeping our newborn close.  While I was happy to wash my hair and spread out a bit by the end of it, we all loved the cozy feeling of waking up all together, hot cider after a stop for snowy play and a memorable drive down the northern California coast.

Double Digits

This awesome, creative kid turned 10!  Family made his day special with legit cowboy gear, hikes, favorite foods and gifts.  Caleb is a good friend and brother, a lover of history and numbers, and ever our wholehearted one.  We love watching you become who you are Caleb.

Elanor Grace

Elanor joined our family on September 20.  She’s a sweet, strong one and no one is in a rush to set her down it seems.  So many helped us make a little nest for her, even from afar during covid.  Her name means “God is my light.”  Indeed, in the midst of a challenging year for our world, she is a little light bearer, just being here.  Welcome little one.

Making a Home, Making a School

We flew to America for the birth of this little one and tucked ourselves into a family home among the redwoods for these months.  Local fires and the need to evacuate brought us even more time with family.  We loved sharing space and schooling together, which included hours in the creek and ocean waves.  Our little Elanor Grace came in the midst of it all, our little light and joy.  Weeks later, my grandmother came home on hospice and Elanor nursed in my arms while we sat by her side, singing hymns and telling her how much we loved her until it was time for her to go Home. So many unexpected things these months and so much time to pull in close to loved ones.  As my sister says, “This IS school…”

Dressing Her

News of a little girl joining our family in the early Fall brought a lot of joy to the community around us.  It was joyful news for us too.  This covid season adds its own element and people reached out in such resourceful ways to show their love for this little one in the womb.  Bedouin friends pressed a maternity dish dash (dress) into my arms after a visit to their tent.  Other friends each crocheted 2 squares during the strictest lockdown season, joining them together to make the most colorful blanket.  They crocheted flowers and knit her some precious little sweaters.  Friends sewed and visited the secondhand market for my growing belly and for her early days.  The boys and I turned some old fabric and a bed sheet into dresses and skirts.  Our hearts are full and this little one is already dressed in a lot of stories and love and beauty…

Evan is Seven!

Joining so many others, Evan enjoyed a lockdown birthday complete with Lego School, a family Lego date, notes and greetings from friends, swimming, a water balloon fight and a movie on the roof after dark.  He was just thrilled that it was his birthday and so were we.  He is still our observant, frank, creative, tough and somewhat magical boy and we loved celebrating him…even if all we had to wrap for him was a box of fruit loops.  No skin off his nose.  He’s a joy.